Odds are this has happened to you… Pushing your trolley round the supermarket, you find somebody else's handwritten shopping list discarded within it. Perhaps left littered loosely or snug tight in the little clipboard. But have you ever thought about the unique stories they could tell?
All persons, events, and institutions are fictitious so any resemblance is coincidental.
The kids simply had the best night EVER!
Bleach was not turning 30 until next year but it was so hard to find a 29th card.
Bits for what?! Bits for what?! Karla knew there was a story there.
When Tim reported back without his mother-in-law's milk, his wife exclaimed, "It is not all about you!" "I know," he replied, "Just ask courgettes."
Dorothy was horrified by the language. Never in all her years as a prison warden had she heard lavatories referred to in that way.
Nikki could have sworn carrots were on the list. Whether it was a horse or dog, the carrots were gone.
Postie Ralph did so well knowing exactly where this was being sent: Aisles 8, 2, 5, 9, then 3.
Amanda was too distracted by the symbols at the bottom. If only she knew.
When he asked the store assistant if he could show her his butter, Greg was politely asked to leave.
Life was always a gamble for Big Stevo. He even wrote his groceries on playing cards. One for every week of the year.
Why he insisted the tissues be brown, Julia never wanted to know.
Marrying a teacher meant that he feared the red pen. This time, at least, Jerome could relax.
Breaking Bad had made it to Morrisons.
The bags would mainly be used for honey and teapots so needed to be sturdy, knew Fernando.
The Mafia's biggest rivals were also on the lookout for Toms. They were known for 'tinning' them.
"She did not have mush room when putting that," muttered Ivan. His teachers from back in the day were right. He was a born joker.
Because last night had been a messy one with the work lot, Steven was not surprised he had picked up 500 vinegars.
The little kite after jam meant something. If only Guy knew.
Katherine had recently come back from a sabbatical in the USA so thought it a bit off that she was expected to entice all of Congress to her dingy Peckham apartment.
He had been waiting for this night all week. A bit of Rob time.
Fred picked up a phone number's worth of items. Since the Navy incident, he always did as he was told.
Fat food? That helped nobody, did it!
For a second, Dylan considered whether the Tetley, Galaxy hot choccie, posh milk, coconut water, or haemorrhoid gel would be good enough for his mum's birthday. In the end, he went to the pub.
Ryan was so angry about the stray apostrophe that he tossed it to the floor. Later, it was picked up by a peculiar man who collects shopping lists. Odds are he does not have a girlfriend.
Ronan was so distracted by his super speedy broom-broom car that he bought meat for Wednesday and deodorant for the postman.
Jess now understood why her father-in-law had called her an 'apos-trophy wife'.
Sarah brought back Thomas Ascot, Tommy Wright, and Tom Forsyth.
How was Lucas meant to get it yesterday?! Why had she put that? He could no longer time-travel ever since the operation and she knew it.
It simply had to be done there and then but Andy knew he had messed up when he tried to purchase a whole shop.
Wipes was fuming. It was fed up of being combined with Toilet Roll again. Handwash could sympathise.
As an Oxford professor of literature, Matthew appreciated the irony of her coming back with tomatoes, oregano, and breadsticks.
With a first date to look forward to tomorrow, Mikel was not sure it was the best thing to buy. But he went for it and got the cat food.
Iain was left utterly befuddled. Various what?!
The sketch of the egg made Deacon's life so much easier.
Dean was glad of the definition of nectarines and bananas. Otherwise, he would have been looking in the cleaning aisle.
Rumour has this as still the most successful shopping outing of Daniel's entire family. So much so, they left it in the trolley to inspire future generations.
The time Danni saved leaving letters out allowed her to shave 2.7 minutes off her wrapping P.B.
Grace was always a maverick. There were tick boxes but she still crossed them out.
Was it a P.I.N. or was she asking for 7,899 loo rolls? Elliott was happy with his guess.
Half a kilo of milk seemed an odd amount but in a rare moment of serendipity, Freddie had his scales on him before his Specsavers appointment.
Mike knew he was masculine. He did not need to write it down.
Because this film was an 18, Aiden was surprised his mum let him watch it.
The lovely lady at the till helped with three down having done it on her break. They had made her take the early lunch slot so Sue was not a happy teddy.
Angie certainly did not have time to play Hangman to work out the first item.
Three Biro pens used but four people stood there. Who had contributed nothing to the task? Lord Sugar was not going to be happy. Especially as all Desmond had done was add fish.
Only 8% of it remained but the police were able to identify the pattern. With this, they could solve the case of the decade.
The home XI had its team down early. The away team was messing about in two groups angering the match officials.
No honey? Absurd.
Such solid gaps. Maeve always left them for changes but none ever came. She was perfect.
Clean-ups in Aisle 22 would now be easier now that customers brought their own supplies.
If you enjoyed these, come along to Kieran’s live show where he uncovers even more gems in the world of other people’s shopping lists.